I'm sick of this blog. All blogs. In fact, I'm finding the internet as a whole rather lacklustre.

I'm indifferent to my inbox, bored with babble and phed up with Photoshop; eBay is nothing more than sad, stale and senseless squander. HTML can go to hell. I never thought I'd say that, but there you have it in black and #EEEECC.

I'm signing off for a while. You'll find me in the garden.

Australia's Glory Daze

I've banged on about The Big Issue here before, so if you'd like a refresher on why it's the best print publication I'm aware of in the country, I suggest you make a detour here.

One of the columns I particularly enjoy is that of editor, Martin Hughes. That I'm likely to be inviting Mr Hughes to avail himself to my professional print skills next year is incidental to my praise here, although if he views me more favourably as a result then no harm done, eh?

I've been watching the recent poncing about of John Howard with a very jaundiced eye indeed, and have been sketching out plans for a discussion of the topic, but found that Martin has done just that in the most recent Big Issue and far better than I ever would have. So, without permission but with full credit to the man, this is what he said:

Among the gongs Prime Minister John Howard has received in recent weeks is the Woodrow Wilson Award for Public Service from the US government. Quick to share the honour with the whole of Australia, the PM says it's a mark of our newfound respect around the world -- with the clear implication being that it's all down to his outstanding leadership.

One thing for certain is that the PM, on our behalf, has a grossly overinflated sense of the nations' importance. Think back, for instance, to the government's chest-beating about Australia being a leading partner in the Coalition of the Willing against Iraq. The US, Britain and Spain hosted a 'Moment of Truth' summit in the Azores a few days before the invasion and Australia -- after all its huffing and puffing -- didn't even get a place on the dais.

The US establishment is clearly keen to keep Australia's support and will do whatever it takes (which evidently isn't very much) to mollycoddle our PM and his cohorts. But the media seem to have bought this story about newfound respect; certainly nobody has critically examined the claim.

As someone fortunate enough to have travelled extensively in recent years -- primarily as a travel writer -- I can only presume the PM is referring to those parts of the world where he seeks respect, as in the corridors of power in the US and Britain. For it does not correlate with my experience, travelling as a sensitive 'New Australian'. While we're still partly seen as laid-back and friendly larrikins, we're also frequently perceived these days as arrogant, loud, intolerant, parochial and -- this will hurt -- tight-fisted.

But this is hardly surprising when you consider that international perceptions of us are funnelled through the frighteningly narrow prism of our movie stars, sports people and budget travellers, as well as the Prime Minister and the things his government does.

The image of us as stingy -- which I, personally, have spent a small fortune trying to dispel -- largely comes from our huge numbers of budget travellers struggling to get a band out of our emasculated buck. Our reputation for arrogance stems from the fact that we seem to produce ambassadors more in the mould of Lleyton Hewitt and Russell Crowe that Ian Thorpe and Cate Blanchett. But these perceptions are superficial and ever-changing.

Much more damaging to our international reputation are the Australian stories that make international headlines, which seep into the collective conscience. Some of the biggest news to travel in recent years has been: the Tampa refugees and our treatment of asylum seekers; the electoral success of Pauline Hanson (nobody appreciated that it was largely within one state); an assortment of backpacker murders; two fingers to Kyoto; the welfare of Indigenous Australians; the rape of Tasmania's forests; Sydney 2000; and the Rugby World Cup.

Only the Olympics reflected favourably on us, and in any way represented the Australia I chose to live in. The PM even managed to turn the Rugby World Cup into a public relations embarrassment when he presented the medals to the victorious England team with all the grace of a bulldog that had found a nettle in his bowl.

In Buenos Aires earlier this year, my relief at finally tracking down an English-language newspaper quickly turned to shame when I read the Cornelia Rau story on page three. That's typical of what people -- at least those who read newspapers -- want to talk about regarding Australia when I'm overseas. That this government has strengthened its grip on power despite/because of these headlines goes a long way to defining us as a nation.

Australia's reputation today is very different from what it was a decade ago, when I decided to move here. I know from my time in Ireland that it's difficult for a small, insecure nation to acknowledge its irrelevance. But at least Ireland when we realised we were a global nonentity we decided to distinguish ourselves by being the friendliest damn nonentity on the planet.

The biggest danger in getting ideas above our station is a lack of humility. Australia is a young, friendly, progressive and confident nation (trapped in an old conservative's body politic) and we should be mindful of conveying that image of ourselves, both when we travel and when we vote.

So Prime Minister Howard, as generous as you've been in your willingness to share this award with the rest of us, to spread the credit for our newfound repect in the world, we couldn't possibly accept -- it's all yours.